The Ultimate Blueprint: What My Big Five Scores Reveal About Leadership, Drive, and the Internal Battle
- Abhi Shah
- 6 days ago
- 4 min read
In my previous posts, I discussed how I applied discipline, system, and unwavering commitment to overcome anxiety and drive a global vision at PressureJet. But where does that relentless need for structure and control come from?
The answer lies in my own operating system. After decoding my Master Mind (INTJ) profile, I wanted to go deeper by taking the Big Five Personality Test (Ocean)—the most widely accepted model of human personality. The results are a fascinating blueprint, one that not only validates my core philosophy but also lays bare the internal conflicts that make self-mastery a necessity, not just a preference.
My Big Five scores reveal the profile of a strategic builder who uses intense structure to manage powerful, complex emotions.
The Engine of Excellence: Conscientiousness (Score: 112/120 — Very High)
If my leadership style could be distilled into one word, it would be Conscientiousness. My score of 112, the highest of the five domains, confirms that my professional life is driven by an intense need to control, regulate, and direct impulses.
This isn't just about being neat; it's the core philosophy behind my pursuit of excellence:
Orderliness (20/20) & Achievement-Striving (20/20): These perfect scores are the source of my focus on system and execution. They define my need to live by routines and schedules, to relentlessly plan, and to strive hard for excellence—not just success, but recognition for success.
Self-Discipline (19/20) & Self-Efficacy (19/20): These high scores confirm the core belief that I have the will-power to persist at difficult tasks and the confidence (common sense and drive) to achieve success. This trait is what allows me to translate a strategic vision into a methodical, achievable plan.
Dutifulness (17/20): This reflects a strong sense of moral obligation. My adherence to rules and commitments is not just a strategic choice, but a fundamental personal requirement.
The takeaway: My relentless pursuit of system, structure, and efficiency in business is simply the external manifestation of my highly conscientious internal wiring.
The Inner Paradox: Mastering Anxiety and Anger
While my overall personality projects calmness (my domain score for Neuroticism is low at 62), the sub-scores told a deeper, more personal story—one that perfectly aligns with my narrative of transformation.
Anxiety (15/20 — High): My score on this specific facet is high. This validates the initial struggle I had with "tremendous anxiety." It shows that my brain's "fight-or-flight" system is too easily engaged, creating a feeling of tension, nervousness, and a fear that something dangerous is about to happen.
Anger (15/20 — High): Similarly, my score for Anger is also high, indicating a strong tendency to feel resentful and enraged when things do not go as planned or if I feel unfairly treated.
The power of this paradox is clarity. My Big Five results prove that my perceived external calmness is not innate; it is a hard-won product of Self-Discipline and Self-Mastery. I had to use my highest trait (Conscientiousness) to control the volatility of my high Anxiety and Anger facets. My ten-year journey of "consistent practice" was literally the act of building a superior system to govern a reactive engine.
The Leader's Profile: Assertive, Principled, and Focused
My scores in Extraversion (74 - High) and Agreeableness (98 - High) reveal the kind of leader I am—one who commands attention but cares deeply about people, albeit through a lens of principle.
Assertiveness (18/20): I am a take-charge individual who likes to speak out and direct the activities of others. This is the voice of the strategist driving the global mandate.
Cheerfulness (20/20): My perfect score here measures my high positive mood and energy—a sense of enthusiasm and optimism. This ensures that while I am demanding, I lead with a positive, energetic outlook.
Principled Altruism (Morality 20/20 & Altruism 18/20): My high Agreeableness is rooted in high Morality (candid, frank, sincere) and Altruism (genuinely finding reward in helping others). This is the foundation of my commitment to "holistic value for all stakeholders".
The Nuance of Sympathy (11/20 — Low): While I am highly moral and willing to help, my sympathy score is low. This means I pride myself on making objective judgments based on reason, prioritizing truth and impartial justice over emotional pity. I lead with principles, not just feelings.
The Mindset: Openness and Intellect (Score: 74/120 — High)
My high Openness to Experience is defined by intellectual curiosity and a love of ideas.
Intellect (16/20): I love to play with ideas, enjoy intellectual debates, and am open-minded to new concepts. This fuels my commitment to constant learning and my belief that "Learning Never Stops."
Emotionality (18/20): This high score confirms that I have exceptional access to and awareness of my own feelings, reinforcing the high EQ finding from my other evaluation.
My Big Five profile, therefore, provides a complete and powerful explanation for my entire personal and professional journey. It shows a highly-driven, strategic, and conscientious mind that has intentionally used its greatest strength (Discipline) to overcome its greatest vulnerability (Anxiety/Anger), resulting in a principled leader focused on global vision.
The lesson is clear: Your greatest trait can always be leveraged to manage your biggest challenge. Mastery is not about erasing a weakness, but about building a superior system around it.